Saturday Night

Andrew and I spent our Saturday night learning how to entertain 4 month old Benjamin. We gave his parents time to go out on a movie date. Turns out that Andrew has the magic touch. Each time Ben would get upset Andrew would figure out a way to calm him down.

Life for me has gotten really busy. I'm juggling an internship with a Residential designer; an evening class to learn Revit, an architectural computer program; still job hunting and trying to finish my office remodel.

My office is in shambles. Somehow in my rush to get it done I've ended up doing everything backwards. The walls are painted but the ceiling is not. I still have to hang my new shelves and eventually repaint the trim. All of my stuff is still scattered throughout the second floor. Unfortunately it's going to have to wait yet another weekend.

Andrew and I are on our way to North Carolina this weekend to see wedding #2 for the Veety family this year. Andrew's brother Matt is about to head down the aisle. It should be a great wedding since the bride is Romanian and we get to be a part of a different culture's traditions.

I've added some links of my favorite new blogs to the right; absolutely beautiful things, bloesem, housemartin and stylecourt.

And if I haven't mentioned it already Andrew is blogging at slowdownandeat. Check it out and see the fun food we ate this weekend.

A shout out to JonBoy, Reverend Bob and Arnaud who are all celebrating birthdays this week. Happy Birthday Friends!

Lessons from Barbara Barry

[via Kohler Interiors, Barbara Barry furniture line]

Feeling defeated this morning.... I thought for sure I would be on the path to my dream job by now, and my ego is having a hard time understanding what exactly went wrong. Insecurity is creeping in....

I have an interview this morning for an unpaid internship. It is in residential design, which I have been avoiding because of its attachment to socio-economic status.

Through the grapevine I found out that the firm I am going to see this morning has a new client that wants the look of Barbara Barry. Barbara Barry is an extremely talented designer of interiors and furniture and I really love her work. I went to her website this morning to do some "research" and I found something on Barbara's "About" page that both surprised me and spoke to me.

"style has nothing to do with money and everything to do with how you feel about yourself."

Residential design is an industry that has an expectation for style and an attachment to where you live, what you wear and what parties you attend. All of this has bothered me from day one...but I've never been able to find a way around it. Barbara's insight reminds me that I can exist in this industry I just have to look within myself, not outside myself.

My other big insecurity in this business is when people call me a decorator. For me it is an association with being uneducated and insignificant. But really, deep down, I know that decorator or not, living in a space that is functional and beautiful is a blessing. I shouldn't be embarrassed to believe that it is important to have a beautiful space, private or public; expensive or not.

Barbara says:
"good and thoughtful design can affect our lives profoundly, and hold us in quiet ways. I believe that beauty is healing and inspiring; I want to help others see beauty in all areas of their lives."

So really all I need is confidence.... sounds easy, right? Confidence in how I feel about myself and confidence in how I feel about design. Guess I've got some work to do....

Here's to a new adventure... Residential interview number 3 (the third one is the charm right?) I hope this one is better than the last two...and I hope it changes my outlook and opens my mind to new opportunities.

Joint Compound

Wow...another week has flown by. I've been busy.

I've been spending most of my time smoothing out the walls of my office. They used to look like this

A horrible decorative/textured plaster job by someone that was obviously an amateur. Some spots were swirled, some flat, some just ugly. And for some awful reason the previous owner did a really bad paint job in this room with a grayish, off-white paint. It was as if they wanted to highlight the ugliness of these walls.

I really can't believe I've lived with it this way for two years. I've spent the last couple weeks covered in joint compound doing my best to smooth out the swirls. I just have to sand one more wall and I'm ready for paint, FINALLY!

This past weekend we were busy with lots of friends. Thursday was softball; Friday was dinner with Leigh and John to hear about their mountain biking vacation to Asheville; Saturday was outdoor movie night at Grand Center (we got to use our new table and the movie was Goonies!); Sunday we drove out to Augusta to hang out at a winery and a brewery with friends (not so fun in 100+ degree heat!)

I have two interviews this week. One for an unpaid internship and the other for what I hope is a full time job. Although the internship is unpaid...I will learn a lot and I can add it to my resume; AND it will keep me out of the house a couple days a week. PLEASE keep your fingers crossed that I don't need the internship and I get one of the jobs I'm waiting for...ever so patiently!

And a quick congrats to our friends Adam and Kelly who just purchased a new home, built in 1875, in the village of Fayetteville, NY. Adam was inspired by our 1907 home in St. Louis and our surrounding community of friends, parks, shops and restaurants. He wanted to find a similar community for his family. I can't wait to see it! I hear they have a tin ceiling in the living room.

card for the day: Be Humble

"Don't allow the approval and attention of others to destroy you. Remain humble and grateful for all your accomplishments, and know that a force greater than your ego is always at work in your life"

~Dr. Wayne Dyer, Power of Intention Cards

This hit the nail on the head today.... Still struggling with the job search, or lack there of... It is very difficult to keep from feeling defeated and insecure every time I get a "we are not hiring" letter. This "lack of approval and attention" is "destroying me..."

The current saying that I have been repeating to myself is: "good things come to those who wait". This makes me think about something greater than myself having plans for me... and to just enjoy the moment while the bigger picture gets taken care of without me. This can be comforting but I also have my moments where I just feel crazy like my hands are tied and I have no control over my future. I just want to go in the back yard and scream as loud as I can..."I JUST WANT TO WORK!"

I had my suspicions that finding something would be difficult....but somehow this process is turning out to be worse than I was prepared for...

As my mother always says, "Whatever is meant to be, will be." I'm just not sure what to do in the meantime....


Actually I take that back, despite all my frustration and angst I have found plenty of time to enjoy life while I've been waiting and staring at my phone...

I've been listening a lot to Regina Spektor's new CD. You can listen to it online.

Last night I watched an interesting documentary on the Sundance channel called Blue Vinyl that I read about via Apartment Therapy:Green. It was good and I definitely learned a lot of good information that I was not aware of....but it also left me with a pit in my stomach. There is a LOT of stuff in this world that is bad for us...and sometimes it just feels overwhelming to try to keep track of it all, much less replace it all. While this director focuses on vinyl siding, vinyl is used in a TON of other household items. It seems almost impossible to get away from it all without making it your full time job.

Tonight I am hosting a punyatithi (auspicious lunar day) at my mediation group because it is Bhagavan Nityananda's mahasamadhi (when a great being leaves his physical body). It's been a LONG time since I hosted but I figured maybe it would be good for my karma...(come on universe! work with me!) I've been attending meditation more often this month and it is nice to have it back in my life.

I'll leave you with my horoscope that I stumbled upon today...
Sagittarius Your power is fully engaged this week as you struggle to express your needs. Although it may be totally inappropriate to just put your feelings out there, you must find an acceptable way to get the energy moving. Don't worry if you don't know what the future holds. Let your highest ideals guide you through a process. Ultimately, your integrity will have the greatest impact on your happiness.

Ring, ring...

[via art.com]

Praise the heavens I got a phone call today!!! (don't get too excited....it's not THE one I've been waiting for....)

I don't want to say too much because it always seems to jinx the whole situation....but considering I have been waiting an entire month it is worth noting.

I have contacted over 20 design related companies in the last four weeks and not ONE single person has had the decency to call me back! Today someone finally called me back...RELIEF!

Now I'm not sure if this phone call will mean that I even get an interview...but it's a step in the right direction and that is a direction that I have been dying for.

I didn't call them back today because I just wanted to enjoy it...relish in it...feel the satisfaction of knowing that I might have at least one opportunity out there! So tomorrow I call. (I'm glad I took my suit to the dry cleaners.)

(P.S. thank you Karen!!!!)

Circular Logic

Photo from House & Garden

I am SOOO in love with this picture. I first saw it when I was quickly thumbing through the latest issue of House and Garden at the grocery store on Monday. Then I stumbled upon it yesterday while doing my blog roll. Turns out the interior design is by Thom Filicia (of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy fame...AND a graduate of Syracuse University, close to my home town). I should have known... I have always really admired his work.

Being stuck in my house looking for a job has really given me decorating fever. I have several projects floating through my head at the moment but it looks like I'm going to start with my room/office/studio. I made the mistake of mentioning to Andrew that I wanted to fix it up and being the awesome husband that he is...he immediately drove me to Lowe's to start the process.
I have already made a mental note to make sure to take before and after photos. I'm taking my inspiration from a layout in Blueprint magazine from last fall.


Stay tuned!